When Auditions Get Cancelled...

Last Thursday I got a call to check my availability for a pilot audition today, Tuesday. I was thankful to have the whole weekend to prepare. Pilots cast fairly quickly and getting four whole days to prepare is rare. I even got to read the whole script which is even more rare. In the past year, I've consciously worked towards stopping myself from getting attached to roles. I commit to the character for the process of audition preparation but I don't get my hopes up the way I used to. 

That's why when the audition got rescheduled for a new time twice, I didn't think much of it. There are sometimes half a dozen roles being cast at any time on a show. I continued to work on the sides and booked an appointment with my coach. In short, I was extremely excited to read for the role. I felt prepared, confident about the choices I had made, and looking forward to giving it a shot. 

Then, I got a call saying the audition had been pushed until the next day. Once again, I didn't think much of it but continued on with my week and once again moved my schedule around to accomodate. The last call I got was that casting had scrapped it all together and I would no longer be seen for the role.

This is the first time that has happened. 

It was a new set of emotions that I've never really dealt with before. I've learned to deal with going in, doing my interpretation of the character, and being at peace when I just wasn't right for the role and they "went in another direction." However, I've never been rescheduled for an audition three times and then didn't get to go in at all. It sort of felt like high school when you do a huge project on time and then the teacher is out sick and it feels like it was all for nothing. 

Luckily, I'm the eternal optimist and I'm just going to tell myself that it wasn't meant to be. In college, I interned at a casting office and saw first hand the chaos that goes around the CD accommodating the director, producers, and networks. It's really no one's fault. It's just a part of the business but this is the first time that I have sides completely marked up with sprawling notes and substitutions resting on my office table. The words and choices I made never even getting the chance to come alive off the page. 

A small glimmer of me is just thankful that this casting director was even going to call me in at all. I'm hopeful that perhaps I'll be kept in mind for another role if the show gets picked up. Or maybe not. But you just never know, do you? I just wanted to share my story to give perspective to anyone recently disappointed over not booking a part to say, "At least you got the chance to go in!" By the way, just writing this out, rationalizing it in my head already made me feel better because I was pretty bummed out earlier today. 

I think I'm most fearful of becoming jaded. All of the frustations we go through as actors can begin to wear on our hearts and steal away some of the enthusiasm that inspired us to act in the first place. I feel a continuous need to be express creativity in some way even if it's not consistently working as an actress. Lately, I've been making videos with my complete infatuation towards style, fashion, and flea market treasure hunting over at Don't Forget to Have Fun. 

Has anyone else ever prepared for an audition and then not gotten the chance to go in for the part?

Hope you're all off to a great start of the week and managing to find peace in the midst of pilot season.

All the best,

Cassidy

 

Comments

[Brittany Baratz]

Yes! Has happened to me a few times. The worst is when they invite you for an audition, and by the time you get in touch with someone to schedule an appointment, the auditions are totally full! At least you are building a relationship with the CD.
ps - beautiful picture!

[Margaret Jackman]

I had a really great audition the other day. Lots of laughs - it was a comedy feature film. Next day, agent gets good report back from casting director... Unfortunately filming now put back for three months. So what happens then? Do I get the part, our go through the whole process again? Another day lost, another rail fare to pay out.