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Yesterday I auditioned via Skype for the first time. Which was weird.
I love Skype, but I always feel just a bit awkward on it. That little box, with my image reflected back at me, taunts me the entire conversation. Instead of watching mom lift our diabetic terrier into the picture, displaying his recent weight loss, I find myself thinking, "Why does my nose look so big? Is it really that big in real life?"
One of my favorite quotes from a professor is one I wasn't ever around to witness firsthand. It was from a good friend's history professor, who would talk about something that happened a long time ago that seemed eerily like something happening now. The prof would look then stop, look at the class, and, totally deadpan, say "Remember kids, history has absolutely nothing to teach us today."
As we watch protests on Wall St unfold, we're starting to see this not only in history, but in historic theater. Last week, in battery park, I watched an adaptation of Ben Jonson's The Alchemist. The twist? change the words "alchemists" to "stock brokers", and tweak the names of a few key characters, and you find something that, while full of slapstick, also has the same effect as that prof's statement: Oof. This sounds familiar.
Here's one of the things I wanted to talk about that happened a month ago. My apologies to the associations involved for the delay.
Before Labor Day Weekend I attended an awards show. No, not the VMAs; though I will talk about that later.
On Wednesday, August 24th, I attended the 2011 Voice Awards hosted by Peter Krause (Parenthood) at Paramount Studios.
I was my good friend Lisa Jay's plus 1 that night to an awards show hosted by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Support Association.
Lisa Jay is on the board of No Kidding Me Too!, an association raising awareness for mental 'dis-ease'.
The Voice Awards are unique. Not only does SAMHSA acknowledge artists and entertainers who speak and create on behalf of those struggling with mental illness and addiction, but the association also awards the people who actually live the stories actors play.
I saw this poster when I walked out of the C train today. I was so excited, I took a picture! I hear the second season of 'The Walking Dead' is going to be awesome. Okay, wait, I know it's going to be awesome!!! And I know it's going to be awesome because I'm in it!!!
"One thing that helped was a picture I kept in mind, this image that I used over and over whenever I was faced with these daily choices. I pictured a runner running on a racetrack...And she did not run a free and clear track, she ran one that required her to jump numerous hurdles...This way obstacles became a natural part of the course, an indication that I was right where I needed to be, running the track, which was entirely different from letting obstacles make me believe I was off it. On a racing track, why wouldn't there be hurdles?"
-Liz Murray (from "Breaking Night")
One of my biggest challenges in returning to an acting career has been the daily hurdling of the mental barriers of doubt and regret. I'm coming back from a break during which many women my age have been laying groundwork, and are now making great strides. Their careers clearly illustrate a possible example of what my career might look like if I hadn't taken time to "find myself". Daily I must leap over these mental hurdles and keep moving forward, taking the next right action, trying to enjoy the ride.
Then there are the annoying hurdles of the day job, grocery shopping, housework, standing in line at the DMV... all that tedious life crap that pulls my focus away from my career, so much so that it can become difficult for me to see how I'm ever going to move forward with all of this stuff in the way!
But then there are days when the hurdles vanish, revealing wide open track, and there is this gorgeous stretch where I am just running through life, free and easy, with the wind at my back. One of these days was Thursday, when someone actually paid me to lie around in pajamas all day. Yes, you read that right.... I booked a job y'all!!!
I have a mouthful. I have a whole lot of mouthfuls. I have a whole lot of wonderful mouthfuls of things to tell you.
I have a whole lot of wonderful mouthfuls of great news, inspirational moments, beautiful experiences that happened as long as a month ago that gave birth to many more mouthfuls of wonderfully insightful and courageous perspectives to share with you.
I just haven't had the time to write about it all! AH!
And I can't get it all out in one big fat bloggy mouthful because that would be too much to say at once and because my editor would kill me for writing a novella!
But I haven't forgotten about you, readers! I haven't! I'm still here and I know I owe you a nice juicy one. It's been a while.
I've just been juicing it up, in my brain, stirring the words, harvesting the through-lines, mixing the imagery, concocting the one-liners, brewing my blogs, until they are ready to be served up like verbal versions of a perfectly laid out pizza.
Can you believe on an early Sunday morning I dragged my my lazy bum out of bed to dress in pink and run (Er,okay...I walked.) a 5k?? It's true!!! In fact for the last month or so I've been making early morning runs and walks a regular thing to get ready for Sunday. All this preparation was inspired by my super cool roomie: Cambra.
I met my roommate Cambra on the First National Tour of August: Osage County. She was the stage manager. I remember meeting her the first of week of rehearsal and being so impressed by this beautiful, young girl who was able to hold her own with actors and directors twice her age. She was extremely organized and focused, while also being one of those kinds of people that is able to connect and laugh with just about everyone in the cast and company. Everyone had a crush on Cambra!
Early on in the tour, Cambra announced one night after a show that she found out she had breast cancer. I guess most people would quit their touring job and go home for the treatments, but Cambra said she would try to keep her job on tour and fit in chemotherapy and other various surgeries and treatments in on days off. "I''m going to lose my hair, I'll probably lose a lot of weight, but I'm going to be here with you guys. I'm going to try my best to be here." I can't imagine there are many people out there able to run a Broadway show while also going through chemotherapy, but she did! I myself got exhausted traveling and keeping up with the show every night...And I was perfectly healthy! I don't know how she did it!
An audition today for Mary Poppins left me thinking about my childhood. Apparently they were auditioning children too, and I couldn't help but think about how different my life would have been had I grown up near the city.
I have always worked in professional theater...just not in New York. Various people carted me off everyday to rehearsals, lessons and performances. I spent my summers in awe of the b-list Broadway actors brought in to star in my local pro theater company's main-stage shows.
As a child I worked with these people and learned from them, longing for the day when I would be flown in from New York to fill their shoes. I imagined the children in the cast looking at me, their eyes all aglow, and I would tell them stories of when I was a little girl on that same stage.
Continue reading "Ever Wonder What It's Like to Be a Child Actor?" »
My philosophy with auditioning has always been "Do the best I can with what I have to work with and let it go". And that has worked for me. There are always all these factors that go into casting. So many that we have no control over. I am a redhead. Will be until the day I die. I have gotten roles because I am a ginger. I have lost roles because I am a ginger. I have no control over that.
I do, however, have control over my attitude.
If I go into the casting room and do my personal best...I am happy. Getting the part would be a total bonus.
The only time I get REALLY annoyed is if I mess up something I have control over. If I am not properly prepared or if I get in my head. Those times, yes, I feel the frustration. Luckily, those times are few and far between these days.
When in a cold theater, looking up at a big movie screen projecting a flawless performance by one of your favorite actors, it's easy to get lost in the moment. You suspend your disbelief and become entranced in the world that is being created by a lot of talented and hardworking individuals. It's easy to forget that all of that started with a script.
One of the things I like to do during my "Office Hours" is scour the internet for old audition footage. I think it's super helpful for actors to see what other actors did to get the part. Were they completely off-book? How did they interact with the reader? How did they use the space? etc.
Continue reading "The Audition that Booked (Rachel McAdams)" »
I have a challenge for you as an actor. I just want to see how this works out. If you are somewhere that auditions using monologues, like New York (apparently LA doesn't like them), this is for you.
1) Find a free afternoon or evening in your schedule. You need two hours.
2) Invite ten actors you know and like to your living room for those hours, and tell them to prep a monologue they use for auditions. You don't need to get all of them there, just make sure they've been invited. Tell the ones that say they can come to bring other actors.
3) Get everyone seated, and get as many people as are willing to do their monologue. After an actor finishes, give them feedback as a group, and ask them to do it a second time. Give them more feedback, and then move on to whoever wants to go next.
4)Go out for drinks together afterwards and have some fun.
"The best way out is always through."
- Robert Frost
“If the career you have chosen has some unexpected inconvenience, console yourself by reflecting that no career is without them.”
– Jane Fonda
“You have to be open-minded when those early opportunities present themselves; take advantage of them whether they’re going to make you a lot of money or not.”
- Rachael Ray
"So I know you just got into town,..." My roommate greeted me with early yesterday morning, "But I just got two tickets to the Andrea Bocelli concert in Central Park for tonight...Do you want to go??"
I glanced at my huge suitcase on my bedroom floor, and my to-do list on my desk. Then, I peeked through the window at the looming rain clouds.
"Umm. Yes!!! Omigod! Yes, I want to go!!" (Sometime, it's cool having a very well-connected working, Broadway stage manager as a roommate because you occasionally get the hookup on tickets to awesome events and theatre shows like Andrea Bocelli in Central Park.)
I've been working on a top secret tv show (Though it won't be a secret for much longer...!!) down in Georgia, and I've been away from NYC for quite awhile. I had plenty to do and needed to catch up with life and work and friends when I arrived back in town yesterday. However, seeing Andrea Bocelli in Central Park seemed like an event I could not pass up. So, I turned over my to-do list for the evening and shoved my suitcase close. Then I began digging through my closets for ponchos and umbrellas and hats to keep warm during the show.
I've been told that it's good to take any kind of experience related to the world of acting that falls into my lap. So when opportunity knocks, I try to answer the door. And this week, one door lead to another, which lead to another.
It all started last week when I was asked to videotape some local auditions. I said sure. After all, it's always good to be in audition rooms on the other side of the table. You get to see what other people are bringing. You can learn a little bit about what to do... and a great deal about what NOT to do.
When I got there, the director asked if -- instead of filming -- I could be a Reader (a scene partner for the auditioners).
In grad school, I did a workshop with Carl Forsman (Drama Desk nominated artistic director of Keen Company in NYC). It was both a cold reading workshop and a lesson in how to be a Reader. So even though I've never technically been a Reader before, I felt prepared. And I said yes.
Continue reading "The Circuitous Path to My First Commercial" »
A word of advice: If you are ever feeling lost in this business and need a little boost, I highly recommend going to see a really great live performance.
I also think seeking out smaller theater companies is a great way to remind yourself why you do this. There tends to not be a lot of money in smaller local theater companies. That means that the forces behind them are there because the work is important to them. Well, the work is important to me too, so that environment should be a good fit.
Last night I saw, for the first time, Side by Side by Sondheim with Singing OnStage Productions, and it was inspiring!
It was almost cool enough in my apartment this morning to start the day with hot coffee.
Almost.
I always love this time of year when summer starts to feel like fall - the end of one thing means the beginning of something else.
People start coming back from vacation, physically and mentally, the “New Season” starts getting into gear and there is an exciting feeling of “let’s get this shit done” in the atmosphere.
It’s also that time of year when you start to come back from the haze of summer - maybe something about the air being cooler let’s me think more clearly, or maybe the academic calendar is so ingrained in my system that I will automatically start waking up earlier and craving the feeling of crisp, clean notebook paper each September - whatever it is, I feel the impulse to make lists, check thing off of them, “go back to work.”
What is it about saying "I am an actor" that makes people offer unsolicited advice? This very thing happened again this weekend when I was at a BBQ with a bunch of total strangers. The conversation went something like this:
Random dude: "What do you do?"
Me: "I am an actor."
RD: "Oh, where do you waitress?" <insert laugh track here>
Me: "I actually have never worked in the service industry. I would be too tempted to do a sneezer."
RD: "Well, you better get to college young lady because you won't ever be able to pay the bills doing something like acting."
There is now so much wrong with this conversation I hardly knew where to begin...I am way beyond the average college years. I have been paying my bills with money earned from acting for the last 15 years. I would be a terrible waitress. The list goes on and on...
I’m so excited, no more commuting into New York for auditions any more. I’m finally living here.
The past couple weeks have been an absolute whirlwind and the fact that I am truly living in New York City hadn’t really hit me until about a week into being here. Waking up in my apartment was great, but it didn’t really feel real. The point that I finally realized how great living in the city was when I had my first double audition day and a bunch of appointments. It was the coolest feeling to wake up in my own place instead of a hotel or on a friend’s air mattress, and have the freedom to come and go as I pleased and pack a light bag, not a whole suitcase.
