I had this film audition Saturday that I'd been pretty psyched about. Good script and the director seemed really organized. He'd scheduled the auditions a month in advance, had the sides and full script available online and his emails were super-detailed yet succinct. However, when you schedule an audition that far in advance, things crop up. So he sent three separate confirmation emails… which seemed a liiiittle controlling… but whatever.
Then when I arrive yesterday – no more than 10 minutes early as repeatedly requested – the director strides across the room and up to my face and says, "Do you know the stated reason why he (the other character in my scene) has come with you to your apartment?"
Hey, nice to meet you, too.
"I'm sorry?" I asked, taken off guard.
He repeated, "Do you know the stated reason why he went upstairs with you?" I wasn't sure what he was getting at since the male character never 'states' why he is coming up with her. "They just got back from a vacation…" I fumbled. "Yes!" he bellowed, "That is right. He's helping her with the bags."
Phew! I got my little trivia question right. What do I win?
"But why is he helping her with the bags?" he pounced again.
This game kinda sucks. At a loss I tried, "Well, maybe he wants a little… you know…"
"To make love?" he looked at me as though I'd just insulted his mother, "No!"
"Are you sure?" I smiled, "I mean he is a man." I chuckled at my own little joke…
Did someone just suck all the humor out of this room with a big hose before my audition?
I wanted to say, "Look, dude. Instead of playing 20 questions, why don't you just tell me? I mean, if I don't get it right, are you going to kick me out? If you are that's fine, but I doubt that's the case so let's just get to it because you're already running 10 minutes late and I was the first audition after the lunch break!"
But I held my tongue and instead ventured, "Well, they went on the trip because he wanted to get back together with her –"
"Yes! Yes, that is right," he looked happily relieved. And so was I.
I did the scene but was so disoriented that everything I'd memorized went out the window. I had the script in hand, but still. I hate it when that happens. I guess I'll have to study more and practice for the oral exam before my next audition.